The Curlfriend Confessional: Bad Curl Advice We've All Been Given (And the Truth)

Some of this advice came from stylists. Some came from the internet. Some came from people who genuinely meant well. All of it did damage!

Let's get something out in the open.

As a curly hair girl with textured hair, most of us did not grow up with proper curly hair techniques. We grew up with products that were not intentionally made for us, and with untrained stylists who did not know enough to give us solid direction.

And somewhere along the way, we we got misguided. We were influenced by the internet and not given adequate information from the salon professionals.

This post is for every Curlfriend who has ever been told something about their curls that did not sit right — but followed it anyway because it came from someone who seemed like they knew. We hear you. We have been there too.

Let's clear the air.

"Don’t use tools- especially brushes”

Here is the truth: brushing dry textured hair must be done with care. Brushing dry highly textured hair should be avoided. Brushing dry curly hair breaks up the curl pattern and because of all the natural occurring bends along the hair shaft can cause breakage. Care must be taken and honestly there is no need for a brush on dry hair IF you are shampooing and detangling regularly to remove fallen hair.

Detangling while prior to shampooing has its place. Wide-tooth combs, finger detangling, and a detangling brush on damp hair prior to shampooing is appropriate when needed. Be gentle.

Brushes are also need to set curls after the shampoo process. However fingers can be used also. Whether you choose a brush, a wide tooth comb, or your fingers, be gentle.

"curly hair can't be colored”

This one kept a lot of us from exploring color for years. And it is simply not accurate.

The truth is that textured hair and color can absolutely coexist — when the approach is right. The key is working with a stylist who understands how to protect curl integrity during the color process. That means proper consultation, the right developer strength, and a moisture-forward aftercare plan that keeps your pattern intact.

Color done carelessly on any hair type causes damage. Color done with intention, by someone trained in textured hair, is a completely different experience.

"you should only shampoo your hair once a month"

We understand where this came from. Curly and coily hair does not need to be shampooed as frequently as wavier more loosely curled hair, and over-washing can strip moisture. That much is true.

But once a month? For most textures, that is not enough — and it can actually work against your curl health. Product buildup, scalp congestion, and most importantly dryness all increase when cleansing is stretched too far apart. Your scalp is skin, and healthy skin breeds healthy hair.

The right wash frequency depends on your specific texture, porosity, how much product you use, and how active you are. For most of our guests, washing every 7-14 days with the right sulfate-free shampoo is appropriate. It is never a one-size-fits-all answer — and that’s exactly why we assess your hair individually before making any recommendations.

"your hair just isn't going to grow past a certain length"

We have heard this one so many times. And we want to say clearly: this is not a curl truth. This is a retention truth.

All hair grows from the scalp at roughly the same rate regardless of texture. The difference is that highly textured hair — especially coils and kinks — experiences more shrinkage, more dryness, and more breakage risk if it is not cared for properly. When breakage at the ends outpaces growth at the root, length retention suffers.

The answer is not to accept a length ceiling. The answer is consistent moisture, protective styling when needed, regular trims to remove damage before it travels up the strand, and a curl specialist who understands the specific needs of your texture. Curl retention starts with the right foundation and professional counsel.

"just use more conditioner — that fixes everything"

We love conditioner. Truly. But conditioner alone does not fix everything, and more is not always better.

Textured hair needs a balance of moisture and protein to stay strong and defined. Over-moisturizing without enough protein can cause hair to become soft, limp, and lacking in definition. Under-moisturizing causes dryness, frizz, and breakage. Too much protein creates a hard cast on the hair causing it to be brittle and break. The goal is balance for both moisture and protein.

What your hair actually needs depends on its porosity, texture, and current state. A high porosity curl needs different support than a low porosity coil. This is why we assess before we recommend, and why we never assume the same curl routine for all.

"you should air dry — heat is always bad for curls"

Heat tools, when used incorrectly and too frequently, absolutely cause damage to textured hair. That is a fact.

But air drying is not universally better for everyone. For some textures — especially fine waves and loops — air drying can cause the hair to dry flat, lose definition, or become frizzy because the curl pattern is not being supported as it sets. Diffusing on a low heat setting can actually preserve curl formation and reduce the amount of time your hair and scalp spends in a vulnerable wet state.

The real answer is not "avoid heat at all costs." It is use the right amount of heat, at the right temperature, with the right protection, for your specific texture. Always layer products and end with heat protection. That’s what intentional curl care looks like.

one more thing

If someone gave you this advice — a family member, a stylist, a stranger on the internet — they were not wrong for trying. It takes a curl community that tells you something different, and a space where your curls are actually understood.

That’s what we are building here.

If you’ve been following advice that has not been working, we would love to start fresh with you. Utilizing our curl systems alongside our trained curl specialist your hair will be assessed, we’ll talk through your history, and give you a clear picture of what your hair actually needs — no guesswork, no trends, just intentional care tailored to you.

Reserve your appointment at helixhousesalon.com and come experience the curl difference for yourself.

As always, we hope you feel seen, heard, and loved today.

Your Curlfriends @ Helix House Salon

Helix House Salon is located in the Western Ave District of Oklahoma City. We specialize in curly, coily, wavy, and kinky textures — and we believe every woman with curls deserves an expert.